Friday 26 April 2013

Lost Love

Anya was is a dilemma, as the old flame was about to be rekindled, when she had bumped into her once lost love, who had left her at such a time in her life, when she was almost ready to spend the rest of her live with him. But due to his familial commitments, Vinay had backed out of their 5 year old strong relationship and walked out on her, though heavy heartedly.

Little did they know 10 years later, they would cross paths again, only to blow up a turmoil in their almost steady lives….Vinay being in a troubled marriage and Anya being a committed relationship with Rumi, her work colleague turned fiancé of 3 years…and they were about to tie the knot that fall…

It was after Vinay’s departure from Anya’s life, Rumi had somehow come to fill her largely void life and had all the offerings of an ideal lover and a perfect husband material… their work relationship was amazingly synchronized and spending almost 8-9 hours of each waking hour with each other, work wise, it wasn’t much of a miracle to have fallen for each other…

It was the 11th of November, Vinay had stormed onto the dance floor almost 4 pegs down, and was dancing away to glory, enjoying himself with his work colleagues, and just when he was in a trance, he thought he saw an aberration, for he could not believe his eyes, that it could ever be true, so he looked hard and to his disbelief it was really Anya dancing with her friends having the time of her life…To make himself doubly sure, he went close to her and stood there watching her, dance….

Vinay could not believe his eyes, it was Anya right in front of him…the love that he himself had lost and had repented for each day of his waking life, since his marriage had not done any wonders for him and his wife had walked out on him.

Meanwhile as he stood there, Anya danced away to glory, as she too was enjoying her last days of being a bachelorette, since her wedding with Rumi was to consummate the following month post which he was to whisk her away to Thailand forever. And being the free spirited person Anya was, she wanted to enjoy her freedom to the core, so she had her guys and girls dancing next to her…and was having a time of her life… when one glance from within her trance of booze and excessive dancing, made her feel alive…as she noticed Vinay standing in front of her…

As the crowd danced away, these two naïve beings, stood in the middle of the dance floor awestruck and in that one moment their whole life flashed in front of their eyes…The time they had spent talking on the phone for hours, hours of long walks and rides taken, fooling around with friends doing absolute dumb shitty stuff, struggling to complete each other’s assignment after spending hours together making out like crazy while exams were on, finding every possible reason to be with each other every minute of the waking hour of the day and then again be on the phone at nights…both the families writing the kids off, as they were so inseparable, it was horrendous to believe that they actually never got married, for the whole world, thought otherwise, that they were committed and married for life…

But life had a different story charted out for them…and one fine day, when Vinay’s father succumbed to a cardiac arrest all of a sudden, as he had lost his entire empire that he had built from scratch due to one wrong move of entrusting his partner with a power of attorney giving the complete responsibility of the company to him, since Vinay’s father had wanted to move to the US for expanding their bearings business, the partner took complete advantage of the situation and dissolved all Mr. Merchant’s stocks and removed him from the post of the promoter and Chairman and completely took over all his businesses pretty much in the countries they had presence…quoting to the lawyers that Mr. Merchant was no more interested in running the bearings business and was planning to set up shop in the US, that is why he was in the US at the time and could not be reached, since he had asked not to be disturbed, as he was gonna sign a very important deal with a leading automobile company, which he was looking to acquire.

Things had changed drastically for Vinay, considering he was in the last year of his MBA and the news of his father passing away abruptly to a shock and the reason behind the same had completely taken over Vinay, who wasn’t vengeful for his blood though, but wanted to somehow get back the lost empire that his father had strived so hard to build. And the way he had planned to do, that was to get doubly rich and buy out his own companies from the partner who had cheated his father. But how he was gonna execute this humongous task was a challenge in itself, soon the thought of growing rich, engulfed Vinay and he could think of nothing but getting back at the partner  every waking moment of his life.

That’s when life gave Vinay a second chance, his paternal uncle owned a small used cars sales company in Canada, and he was looking to expand in the US, knowing about Vinay’s burning passion to make it big, he thought Vinay would be a safe bet, considering he is family, so he made an offer to Vinay which he could not reject and the next flight he was in the US, signing a deal with his uncle who had offered him a small amount as start up and left the rest to him, how to scout business and make his mark in the US after providing him a few inventory.

Meanwhile, back in India, though Anya was a soul mate to Vinay, she had thoroughly understood and supported him in all his decisions, somewhere in her heart it was killing her to let go off him, when they were in their last year of MB A and they had decided to tie the knot after finishing their studies and Vinay was to join Anya’s father’s garment business, which used to manufacture garments for foreign markets. And Mr. Singh had always considered Vinay as family and offered him to run his company. But being the person Vinay was, he could not have taken such a huge favour from anyone and had the burning desire to stand on his own two feet, besides the rage of becoming filthy rich in the fastest period possible was ravaging his mind every breathing minute.

So with a heavy heart they had parted ways, firstly they thought they could survive the long distance relationship, but since Vinay was moving indefinitely to the US and Anya still not sure, what she wanted from her life, they had hit a dead end…Since Anya’s brother had drifted away to US, and ended up marrying a firang, and completely wrote off his family, Anya somehow felt responsible towards her family and she could never think of leaving them, and settling so far off, that she does not even get to see them. So Anya was torn between the love of her family and her childhood love, meanwhile, with Vinay’s father’s death, he had completely changed as a person. He could think of nothing else but money and bicker and fight with Anya at any given chance. Basically he was frustrated with life, until the time his uncle had made him the offer.

So Anya thought, a little break from her, might set him straight, but little did she know, the strings of love were so weak that Vinay wouldn’t even care keeping in touch with her, once he got to the US. Soon the weekly phone calls became monthly and then they disappeared altogether, no calls, no mails, it became a dormant relationship, lost in translation. And the sad part was he never even bothered to officially break up with her, he just practically left her lingering in her past life, not letting her transition into a break up stage….Which eventually after a whole year of yearning and waiting around for him to come back she lost track of time and eventually buried him in her heart.

Lost Love2

Anya eventually gave up on him and moved on in her life. She got herself an financial analyst job in a MNC and started her career…soon bumping on her way, meeting Rumi and then their being on another roller coaster ride of love, but this time, it was real, Rumi was unlike Vinay, he was totally into her..and took care of her completely…Something that Anya had longed for in a very long time. She had totally forgotten what it was to be loved….

With each passing day, she kept on drowning into Rumi more and more, until one day, they decided that they have to take their relationship to the next level and had exchanged rings on their own, considering it as the engagement…and later informed their parents of their decision…

But as months and years passed by, Vinay completely forgot about Anya, and had bumped into Patie, a girl who kinda was a knight in shining armour for him, since she was the daughter to an automobile giant. They had crossed path at a summit for automobile companies where Patie was representing her company as she was the President of her company. And over the years, Vinay too had begun to climb the ladder of success whilst running his uncle’s used car sales company, he too had acquired some roller bearings companies and some of this competitors by acquiring them and was able to make his mark in the market in the used car segment..But as he had a burning desire to do big in life, his ultimate aim was to own an automobile company and enter the market with a big bang…

There was such exuberance in his speech and his passion showed across when Vinay was portraying the sales figures for his company at the summit, and that caught Patie’s attention, later she walked up to him, since she was thoroughly impressed and made him an offer then and there, as they were planning to expand their business in Canada, she asked him if he would be interested to move back to Canada, but only this time, he can run their Canadian office as the CEO. Basically she was proposing an acquisition of his used car division and promoting their set up in Canada, since he had a great network of clientele in both Canada and US.

Though Patie was all beauty but she was so much of brains as well, which Vinay could easily sense, and after one or two deliberations and meeting with Patie, Vinay struck a deal and got himself a decent amount over his company, a plush office in the heart of Canada, a swanky car and a white picket fenced house.
With this stepping stone to success, there was no stopping Vinay now, so sales after sales he began racing the ladder of success. Meanwhile in this whole affair, he never realized how much Patie had fallen for his charm, enthusiasm, hunger for success, endless passion to reach the top, that she practically proposed him pretty much in a board meeting once, as to how madly in love with him she was and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him….She had again made an offer to Vinay which he could not have ever turned down. The next fall the two work crazy duo had walked the Isle and flown off to the Bahama’s for their honeymoon…

But as they say, every good thing comes to an end, so did Patie’s fascination for Vinay, the once hunger for success which she adored, now bothered her to the core, since Vinay could think of nothing but soaring higher and higher, and no matter however high he got, he was never satiated. So Patie practically used to long for him, when he would be busy in meetings, traveling different countries to scout more business, acquiring more and more companies and practically drowning himself in work, pretty much forgetting that he was married and he had a life beyond work.

It was the 12th of December after two years on their wedding anniversary, Patie had, had enough and finally decided to confront Vinay and was her last attempt in salvaging whatever relation was left of them. But as usual Vinay never turned up for their anniversary party and this pissed Patie to the core, who landed up sending Vinay a divorce notice the next morning, which Vinay did not ever care to go through and just signed it across and sent it over, and in a fraction their marriage of 5 years was instantly flushed down the drain. Because Vinay was always so full of himself, that he could not see, what any one had did for him, first he did not see what support system Anya was to him, and now he could not see what Patie had done for him…For him, women were just a waste of time and money…So he was better off alone is what he thought, pretty much while signing the divorce papers…and he did not regret it a single bit…

Standing amidst the dancing crowd, Vinay and Anya’s life flashed across each other…and they just stood there staring at each other in disbelief..for Anya there were so many unanswered questions and for Vinay it was the realization that where he had reached in life and what the fuck had he ended up doing in his intoxication of getting to the top, he was beginning to realize he had been a complete ass throughout and had ended up ruining not only his love relation with Anya, but his marriage with Patie as well.…And none of them could ever forgive him….

And now all the pain and hurt that he had given Anya, was also coming back to him, making him feel like a complete failure love wise..Although he was stinking rich now, having his business practically across the world…He realized what a lonely and sad person he had become and what he had done to his life, being blinded by his one and only goal of becoming stinking rich and getting his empire back, which he had completely forgotten over the years of getting success…

Lost Love Image & Quote

But seeing Anya after almost a decade the whole past had flashed in front of his eyes…And he soon was reminded of his lost goal…which he had wanted to achieve, the whole reason why he even went to the US…And before he could put one step ahead, Anya had stormed out of the pub and was rushing to hail a taxi, when Vinay too pushes across the door of the pub and comes out in a rage, as he was aware Anya wouldn’t wait to hear his explanation and he had never contemplated a scenario where he would ever cross paths with her…So all this was unexpected and surreal for both of them, all those years of yearning and waiting around for answers by Anya, she was in no mood of confronting Vinay, she was sure she would have broken down and beat the crap out of him…for her anger, frustration and dejection had no bounds…

And Vinay knew Anya would take his case royally, and he knew he deserved, for all those lonely years spent, without a clue regarding how he was doing, and not even asking her how she was doing and having the courtesy to officially break up with her, he just drifted off conveniently…and never cared to call…Anyone else would do the same thing, what Anya had done, just run away and never face such a soul in her life…

But considering what Vinay had done to her and also Patie, good sense had finally prevailed on him and he had wanted to repent every single second wasted loosing these girls and now he wanted to make up for the lost time…So in no case was he going to let Anya go, without a explanation, he knew he had no sane explanation and that he was drunked and drugged by the addiction of success that he had lost himself as a person, let alone the fact about breaking up with her in a sane way, that is why the insanity…

He ran after the cab, that Anya had hailed and soon asked another cabbie to follow her and after a point, he caught up to her at a red signal and soon barged into her car and just when she was about to alight from the other end, he held her hand so tight, that she could barely move…Anya was fighting her tears so hard, she in no chance wanted to break down in front of him, she did not wanna show any emotion, but all the pent up feelings were coming to the fore, and she could do nothing but break down…

As he held on to her hand and kept staring her down, her anger…in which she was loud and clear that he was an asshole of the first order and how could he had done what he done, when they had such a good thing going and how could he have left her at such a point in life, when she was almost ready to marry him….That day she had realized that he had never actually loved her but just sought her companionship, for he never really understood the meaning of love, because if he did, he wouldn’t have let her go this easily….is what Anya felt.

But for Anya she had not known anything but to love Vinay and she would have done that till her last breath, she often tried to find him in every guy she met, but no one could ever fill the vacuum that he had left in her heart. He was an unsung song that she had held so close in heart, that only she could sing…and soothe her wounds off…Her love for Vinay was beyond love, it was beyond sacred, it was beyond soulmates..it was something that she lived for, she breathed for, she was destined for, the reason why she was even existent. If she could ever personify her love for Vinay, it would really have been sublime and not of this world.  And that they were meant to be, somewhere in the domain, where there was no right or wrong, where there were no rituals, no morals, no societal rules, regulations, no boundaries, no limits, no concept of time…but just endless and pure, insane love…

So in that one moment and that one expression of fighting her tears, yearning eyes swelled with tears, and a million questions as to why, what did she do to deserve this from the one she loved divinely and could not think of any existence without…where did she go wrong, where did she fall short…why did he have to leave this way….and why he never looked back…she could have waited for him forever…and the look of so many why’s and many unanswered questions….

And Vinay looked into her eyes, which was full of remorse from his side and his willingness to pay the penance for the sublime heart that he had ended up breaking, not once but twice of two divinely, incredible women. He had felt like the lowest of low like the scum on earth…and was willing to do anything to get to redeem himself to her…

Now his grip had lessened as Anya had stopped resisting and their breathing had lowered to a normal level and she was in a position to listen, than the earlier feeling of having a nervous breakdown and a head about to explode….And heart about to pump out of her chest with the heavy breathing…of anger, detest, dejection…and all the negative feelings…

Vinay knew he had this last chance to redeem himself, and was sure he would never get to see Anya ever again in his life, since life does not always offer chances to such pricks…ever again in life..So he had this one shot and he had to give it all….He went at her like a mad horse running helter skelter…in a barn…He was all over the place, explaining to her, how lost in his own world he was, how he went from owning his uncle’s second car sales company to owning a prime automobile company in the Canada and then expanding to the US, and meeting Patie, and ending up hurting her beyond comparison and breaking her beyond repair…He was being thoroughly honest with her…and she listened and listened could not fight back the ocean of tears falling incessantly on his hands…

And in all this, how he confessed to her, that he was blinded by success and never really had the courage to come back and take her hand in marriage, since he had changed beyond reason and he wasn’t the Vinay that she had first loved…And he did not want to ruin her life and the only reason he had ever married Patie was, she was the stepping stone to his success and after which, he neglected her as well, and she eventually left him…

He knew he totally deserved it..but today when he looks back, he realizes the one person who he had ended up hurting the most in all this was her and that he could die and donn a million lives, but would want one chance to redeem himself back and give her the life that she had always desired..if only she could give him another chance..and this he said…without knowing the fact that she was already taken, and that almost a decade had past she had seen him…and had practically written him off her life forever….so taking him back would have been a distant dream…

My Wish

He then moves closer to wipe her tears, but she stops him there and gets off the cab, and runs away…with tears flowing incessantly, she has no clue where she was running, but since Vinay was hell bent on not letting this chance of talking to her go away, he runs behind her…and finally she comes to a park and sits there and breaks down…He watches her from far…and waits for her to lift her eyes…but she goes on crying…and finally after half hour..he goes near her..and she just gives him a look, as though it was too late and there was nothing he could do to redeem himself and win her trust, not even as a friend, let alone the fact of being with her…

Vinay tells her, he knew he deserved this and much worse, and that she was being subtle on him, no other girl would have even let him finish and let him speak his heart out..but Anya being the kind hearted, and empathetic person she was and most of all, yearning for an explanation from him, for so many years, was surely all ears as to what made Vinay change…She had yearned for this closure and finally got one…now she could live in peace…

Having confided to Anya all that he had done in his life, good or bad things, Vinay too feels light and feels that he atleast mended one ailing heart and could die in peace…He told Anya, that she could continue to hate him for the rest of her life, he would not mind, but he had to let her know, how much he still loved her…for all the time, when he was successful, he knew he missed something, but as he had killed his conscience, he had buried her as well as a story of his past and never wanted to read it again…until today, when she was right in front of him and he had to reveal to her, that there was no one else but her, who he had always and forever truly loved, but just never had the courage to live up to his promises of marrying her and making her his bride….

He knew he had screwed up and nothing and no one would ever give him a second chance in life, but the mere fact that, God gave him this opportunity and crossed paths with her once again in life, was a sign that, God did not hate him beyond reason after all..And that he had a chance of becoming a better person in life..now he could live with the fact that, for once in life, he did the right thing…and confessed to the one he loved, no matter he would never get her back in his life, but he could live with that fact, that he at least got a chance to tell her, how much he loved her...though he realized it late in life…but that is something that he deserved…having hurt two women who loved him with their complete heart and soul….

Anya without a word takes Vinay’s hand in hers, and places a ring inside his palm and closes it..and leaves…without looking back…And Vinay sits there with his hands over his head….watching the love of his life, leave him once again…only this time, he feels a deep crater of a pain in his heart, that she leaves behind…only to make him realize how it feels to be left lingering in the wilderness of lost love…and wondering bot' the fact that whether the one we love will ever actually come back….


Quote

He opens his palm and finds the ring, he once put on Anya's finger, the day he had proposed to her during their senior year of college…and had made plans of doing MBA together and after finishing studies they were to get married….She had held on to his ring as an unkept promise from him….never to be fulfilled eventually, but somewhere in her heart, she had desired that one day he would come back, and make her his bride and put on her finger the wedding ring she deserved and all those years of craving would have just ended then…

But that day never came…and Vinay was left with nothing but an empty life, full of fame and success, but the one thing, he had craved for and not really known the importance of, had walked away from him, in front of his eyes, and there was nothing he could have done about it….but to narrate his story to all those self centered beings, who do not realize what it is to cherish true love, and not to repeat the mistakes that he had committed in his life and not to let go of such a priceless treasure…

Coz money will often come and go, but true love never comes twice..so you better hold on to it as tight, while it is with you and never let go….coz God gives second chances only to a lucky few and the ones who really deserve it…and sadly Vinay wasn’t going to be one amongst them….

Love by Chance quote

Regret

Cheers!!
Seeta

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